Okay so I just weighed myself and I’m 141.8 lbs. You might think that’s only a .4 lb loss from the last time I updated…but it’s actually almost a 30 lb loss from the last time. Let me explain what happened…
The last time I updated my weight was in June. Over the course of the summer I wasn’t eating healthy and I only went to the gym once in a while. I was just hanging out with friends, spending time at the cottage, eating junk food, etc. I got up to 150 lbs but by September I took control and lost 5 lbs and went down to 145 lbs. Then I went on an exchange program for a little less than 3 months to Europe. Before I left I decided that while I was there I would lose the 20 lbs and get down to my goal weight. I was a bit wrong on that…
The people I stayed with ate horribly. I’m talking take out almost every night- chinese food, pasta, pizza, kebab, chicken and fries, etc. Not only that but the house was filled with junk food: chocolate, cookies, nutella, ice cream, pudding, chips, fried cheese sticks, soft pretzels, donuts, cakes, pastries. I’m someone who has a bad relationship with food, and have very little discipline. If it’s in the house, or right in front of me, there’s a very big chance that I will eat it. The first couple of weeks I thought okay I’ll just enjoy the food for a bit and then eat healthy. I couldn’t exercise because I was staying in a small apartment (I’m talking really small - like the bathroom was one of the only places I could do jumping jacks small). It was snowing almost the whole time I was there and even though I went on walks quite a few times, it was never enough for me to actually burn off what I ate.
The best part of the whole thing was that their scale didn’t work, so for almost 3 months I had absolutely no idea how much I weighed. After the first month I started to eat healthy quite a few times but I would always give up after a couple days. I just didn’t have enough discipline to say no to the bad foods. Especially chocolate..
A couple weeks before I came home, I noticed that I had gained some weight, but I had to base it on what I looked like. I thought that I had probably gained 10 lbs and was back up to my original (and highest) weight of 155 lbs.
Well… I came home and as soon as I got in the house the first thing I did was run to the bathroom to weigh myself. I almost passed out when I saw it said 170 lbs. (I don’t actually remember if I hit 170 lbs but I was about 168 and 169 lbs. It doesn’t really matter.) Anyways I became so upset about my weight. I was so mad at myself for letting my weight get up that high. At the same time I was so sad that I just wanted to cry every time I looked in the mirror. I was at the highest weight I have ever been at and I was so embarrassed. I barely left the house the first two months, and when I did I wore a big coat that hid most of my body and my legs. (It was still winter, at least that was a plus). But the worst part of it was that I still wanted to eat all the crap that I had been eating and I craved it 24/7. About a month after I came back I was still at the same weight because even though I was trying to eat healthy I would always end up eating too much and just giving up and eating junk food.
Finally I decided to do something about it. I went on a pretty strict diet and lost 15 lbs in about a month and a half. I didn’t exercise during that time because I was having a hard time with just the diet and I couldn’t even manage a short cardio workout. So after the first 15 lbs I started going to the gym again and I lost 6 lbs and got down to 149 lbs. Then I gave up a bit because I thought well I’m close to the weight I was before, I can give myself a break. I stayed at that weight for a month and then I realized I’ve already lost so much weight, I can keep going and get to my goal weight. I never wanted to get to 170 lbs ever again and I didn’t want to stay in the 140s or 130s. I just wanted to get to my goal weight.
So that’s where my journey re-started. Two Mondays ago, I started eating healthy and working out every day. The first week I lost 2.8 pounds and the week after I lost 3.4 pounds. This is the longest that I have ever kept up with eating healthy and working out and I honestly believe that this is the time for me to lose weight and get to my goal weight and dream body.
So there you go, that’s why I haven’t updated my weight in a while. But I’m back now and going all the way to my goal weight :)
Tuesday Jul 7 @ 11:30pm
